Kate says . . .
Ahh wives, can we relate to what Brad was saying in his last post “Look at My Sacrifice”? Yes, you might have recognized your husband’s habit of “making sure no good sacrifice goes unrewarded”, but on the other had we all can relate to the problem of sacrifice. We can easily fall into doing, doing, doing and only seeing ALL that our husbands are NOT doing.
When we feel like we are doing it all and our husbands are just sitting back relaxing, or doing what they want, it is easy to tally our own mental list about all that we have sacrificed for them. I don’t know about you ladies, but in the past my list could be oh so long and as it got longer, I got angrier. Then when the time was right and we were arguing, I would unleash all of my anger and use my list with it. So what we started arguing about most times, is not what we ended up arguing about. Any other wives been down this road?
Studying what God asks of me as wife in Ephesians 5 has shown me that my focus was all wrong. So far of base it was unbelievable.
Ephesians 5:22 “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord”.
Ephesians 5: 33 “ . . . and the wife must respect her husband”.
Now, these verses are in my heart everyday as I have the pleasure of being Brad’s wife. Some days I do better then others, but my heart’s desire is to be the wife God wants me to be. When I am swamped and feeling overwhelmed, I try to remember that respecting, loving and serving my husband is my top priority, other then serving God. I have had to learn to focus on what matters and leave the rest to wait.
In one of my earlier posts I talked about God revealing His desire for my obedience over sacrifice. Here is an excerpt from that post “Who’s on First?” :
God has revealed to me through His word, that much of what he asks us to do is about obedience! Obedience, not just sacrifice. Yet, we tend to look at our life of faith in God as a sacrifice. We think, we are doing what God wants of us and therefore we are willing to sacrifice. But really if you look at the scriptures, God wants our obedience. Yes sometimes with obedience he will call us to sacrifice as well. I think the story of Abraham and Isaac is an amazing example of this. God asked Abraham to prepare his only son, with Sarah, as an offering to the Lord. The same son, that God said would have descendants numbering more than the stars. I know that I am always saying, that I am ready to do whatever God calls me to do, and I really do mean it, but can you imagine being asked to sacrifice your child as a burnt offering to God?? I am sure Abraham, was a mess inside. Even if God’s plan is best, we still hurt. But Abraham took Isaac, up the mountain. At one point Isaac asked his father, where the animal was for the burnt offering. Abraham told his son that God would provide the offering. Yet he still prepared the fire, bound Isaac and placed him on the fire, preparing to slay him. WOW, talk about obedience. But you may say, this story is about sacrifice but the way I see it, Abraham, was obedient! He did exactly what God has asked and in return God did provide another sacrifice. God desires our obedience, first and always. He is less impressed and worried about the sacrifices we think we are making for Him and more interested in our obedience to Him! We see this as a theme of the Israelites as they wandered in the desert, as well as in Jesus as the ultimate example of this!
“During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission. Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered and, once made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him…” Hebrews 5:7-10 (NIV)
Even Jesus, who was called to the greatest sacrifice, was called to first be obedient to his Father’s will! Amazing!
When we are stuck in the sacrifice mindset within our marriage try to refocus on obedience to God’s word for us as wives. What kind of attitude does he want us to have with our husband? Remember that many times we set the tone in our household, we have the choice to bring calm and peace or anxiety and tension.
What are some ways that you can refocus on obedience? Have you known this to be true in your own life? We would love to hear how sacrifice and obedience has played out in your marriage. Share how you have focused on God’s word. I believe that when we focus on obedience, God blesses us!