Kate’s post, “Sex on the Treadmill” drew the connection that getting out the “groove” of sex will have impacts on your marriage just like getting out of the habit of exercise will have impacts on your energy level. Since that post I have been wondering exactly how I should take this message to husbands. While, I’m not recommending trying sex on the weight bench, I do think that a man’s strength has a great deal to do with his mood, energy level, and yes even his sex life.
While I have been contemplating writing this post I have also been wrestling with back pain. Periodically I have a back issue that flairs up and limits my ability to do things and even my mobility. I’ll just move or step wrong and all the sudden I’m putting on a Leaning Tower of Piazza impression for a few days. During these times I have learned how much of an impact physical strength has on a man’s overall mood.
“Strong” is written into the male DNA, it is how God designed us. Want to encourage a guy? Tell him you appreciate his strength. (Guy’s I don’t recommend doing this to another man, it has inherently sexual overtones, hint hint wives!)
I am NOT saying that all real men are muscle bound bouncer looking guys! (In the words of Steve Carell, “Why, why do you need muscles on your shoulders like that?) I am simply pointing out that physical strength is an important component of every man’s self-image. If you do not feel strong for one reason or another it will have an impact on every area of your life.
Keep It In Mind
In a world where the average person is starting to look more like a circle then a rectangle, I think it is very important to remember our internal connection to feeling strong. If you have an injury, either temporary or permanent where you are unable to do some physical activities it is important to remember that this will “bleed” into other areas. I know when my back is giving me issues I tend to be argumentative and disagreeable. Now that I have identified these tendencies I can work to correct it. And now that Kate understands what goes on in my head when I’m laid up, she lets me know that she sees my strength even when I can’t lift anything for her.
Build It Up
I know that I always feel better emotionally, and yes even sexually when I have been getting exercise. This isn’t a post extolling the virtues of exercise but true is true! I feel better when I feel stronger.
Use it Correctly
Just because God build men stronger, and I’ve just written a whole post about how that is a good thing, I am not advocating using that strength inappropratly! Remember guys the standard to live by is “Love your wife as Christ loved the Church.” That is a strong love, but it is compassionate and tender in its strength!
Do other guys see the connecting between strength and self image?
Wives, do you tell your husband you think they are strong? How do they respond?