Kate says . . .
Do you ever wish that you could have many weddings? That you could do it again all because becoming the fairy tale princess was fun? Wearing the pretty dress, seeing your man looking dapper . . . I might be one of those only wives out there that say – no way! Planning a wedding is a nightmare! I say that in jest, but there is some truth to it as well. I can always put my dress on again for fun and my dear hubby likes to look dapper for me, so I am GOOD!
Aside from all of the nightmare of planning the wedding the special part is the vows. The words that we chose to speak to each other, in front of God and friends and family. We say a great many things, but have not truly had time to comprehend the true depth of what we are saying. Even if you have an idea of what the vows mean, there is still so much more that you will go through in your lifetime together that you would have never predicted. Perhaps if you knew, some of you would have thought twice about marriage. For most of us looking at all of the joys you would experience together you might fall head over heels in love (again) with that hubby of yours.
As a photographer, I have had the unique experience of listening to quite a few wedding sermons. Each time I walk away amazed anew at God’s plan for marriage. At this point in our lives, with small kiddos, I only photograph weddings for friends and family. So the services I get to experience are for those we care for and have a vested interest in their marriage. I wanted to share with you today some of the things I have heard spoken and how they bring value well beyond words just for a special day when you pledge your everything to each other.
To all those preachers out there, I hope I am getting your quotes right! Regardless thank you for speaking truth and wisdom at weddings and not just fluff and fairy tale! It may be a lot for the bride and groom to take in, but there are many people who have open hearts to hear God’s word for marriage. Keep on preaching it!
“Love Christ preeminent (first), Love your spouse second-always!”
“Your friends are great and they bring much joy to you, but if you allow them, they can take away from your marriage. Don’t allow them this place.”
“If and when children come you will want to do what is best for them. If you truly want to do what is best for your children-do what is best for you marriage!”
“When you look back on this day, your wedding day, may it be the day that you loved each other the least.”
“You today as bride and groom are a picture of the church and Christ. You are a living parable of God’s word.”
“Today is the beginning of a journey!”
Ahh . . . that last one always gets me. I don’t think any of us realize the fullness of the word journey, yet it is such a beautiful picture.
Anyone who has been married for a week or more, knows that marriage is not always easy. It has its ups and downs. So how do we bring value to the things we have heard and pledged to one another on our wedding day?
Everything we need to know about marriage and what God’s desires, is in His word. The Holy Spirit can and will teach your heart how to love your spouse, if you ask and invite Him to do so. Seek God’s word and ask Him how you can be the wife he wants you to be. Not the wife down the street, your mother-in-law or anyone else! Just His design for you as the special wife of your hubby.
Self reflection vs. Self interest
When you have times of confusion and sadness, when there are hurt feelings; stop and self reflect. Ask God what He wants to show you about yourself in all that is going on. I believe there are very few times where one person is completely at fault or responsible. Stop focusing on your own self-interest and refocus on what you need to learn!
Serve One Another
One of the best memories I have from our wedding was our foot washing ceremony (John 13: 1-17). Brad and I chose to pledge to one another that we intended to serve each other. Have we always walked this out? No. There have been many times where we have lost sight of that pledge. Yet I am reminded of how we bowed before each other and vowed to serve the other first, no matter what. Keep serving your hubby in everything.
Grace is one of my most favorite concepts throughout the Bible and it is also baffles me that God chooses to extend me grace for all that I have done and will ever do. Practice extending grace to your hubby. Nothing will speak louder than following Christ’s gift of grace.
Hold on tight and never let go
Where ever you go, whatever you do, no matter how many bad things you see, no matter what you lose, no matter how many sicknesses befall you-DO IT TOGETHER!! Hand in hand! Every little challenge and every big climb-do it together. Every beautiful experience-do it together. Oh and sex, do it together-often! :-) We were designed to be one flesh, once married! Embrace God’s plan and know that he will be with you through every moment!
“Today I join my life to yours, not only as your beloved but as your friend, your love and your confidant. Let me be the shoulder you lean on, the rock on which you rest, the companion of your life. With you I will walk our path from this day forward.” – Part of our wedding vows
How are the ways that you bring value to your wedding vows, whether spoken 40 years ago or 1?
Share with us the ways you have learned to walk out those vows.