Kate says . . .
Have you ever had one of those moments? You know what I am talking about ladies . . . a moment where you hubby is making his desires and needs to be physical with you apparent and your seriously thinking about feigning a headache. Then there are times that actually have a headache and your excuse is legitimate.
As someone who struggled with headaches since I was 10 years old, I know all too well how they can quickly become a reason for pushing away your hubby’s sexual advances. When your head is pounding you cannot fathom wrapping it around making dinner, much less making “dessert” in the bedroom! 
Ladies, if you struggle with headaches, either occasionally or on a regular basis, have you ever tried having sex to get rid of the headache? I know it goes against all that we think and feel during a headache, but hear me out.
When we share sexual intimacy with our hubby we:
- Are able to set things aside, sex is a wonderful diversion to all of life’s stresses, physical and non-physical.
- Exercising our body as well as all activate our bodies chemical endorphins.
- Focus on someone else, putting their needs first.
- Feel relaxed and sometimes energized in the beautiful aftermath of sex.
- Are able to sleep better.
God designed sex as a simplistic, yet intricate, way for a husband and a wife to connect. It meets needs in us that we sometimes don’t even know are there.
Is it so hard to believe that sex can relieve the tension of a headache? Take it from someone who has frequent headaches and also enjoys sex with my hubby. Sex CAN relieve a headache. Why not give it a try, next time you have that nagging headache?
There are times that a headache is just a “killer”! Obviously those are the times you snuggle in your hubby’s arms and allow him to take care of you. I have had plenty of those moments as well. Yet, I think there are too many times that we “just don’t feel right” so we push off our hubbies desire for sex until the next day or beyond. Next time rather then automatically saying no, try thinking, “well maybe that would help me to feel a little bit better.”
Do any of the wives out there have had similar success with pushing through the aches and pains of life to share sex with your hubby? Has that been helpful for you? I would really love to hear from other wives out there.
Absolutely true! I have had migraines since I was about 10-11, and they can run for 2-3 days. It is excruciating, but I found that I can get to orgasm with one, and it eases the pain. One time I told my husband that I did not understand the headache excuse, if it helped relieve it, why not do it! However, it was only recently when we started being intentional about getting me to orgasm, so I don’t blame women for feigning headache or not wanting sex during an actual headache, if they are just going to get….well, if it’s one-sided! I sat my husband down and told him that I actually needed sex during my migraines, but we needed to work at what could be done to get me to orgasm, even if it meant me helping in the end. He was rather uncomfortable with this at first, but I think that knowing that he is helping me with pain management, and knowing that it will not be an excuse in our bedroom, has really helped. “Honey, I need my medication!”
Good for you Amber! You knew what you needed and shared it with your hubby
Working together is the best part of marriage … I usually can’t unless I help myself … hubby doesn’t take it personal … he figures whatever it takes to get me there he’s okay with it 
Hi Amber! Nice-I love the “needing your medicine”! I am sure he LOVES that!
It is good to hear from others that have experienced the same! Good for you guys talking about it and finding this to be therapeutic! Blessings to you and your hubby! Kate
It used to help me get rid of a headache now it tends to give me one afterwards … I just take some Tylenol earlier in the evening and poof I’m ready for him
or if I don’t and get a headache after I just take a couple Tylenol … why miss out on something so great? I told my hubby I can’t understand women that either don’t take the time, don’t want to take the time or just fake it … why miss out on something so amazing … if you’re having trouble getting the big “o” then figure it out, perhaps with his help? It’s more than worth the effort 
Hi Sandra! Thanks for sharing. I have also heard and looked into recently, that some people get headaches after sex. That is not abnormal, yet it is definitely something to talk to your doctor about, becuase they can help. For me having had headaches from a very young age-I am sorry to say that Tylenol has never once relieved one of my headaches. Thankfully Advil will, but not always.
Thanks for sharing and lets hope people will give it a try-it can’t hurt to at least try it once!
Blessings to you and your hubby! Kate
I thought I might have been the only person who regularly gets rid of headaches ion the bedroom but it seems not
My husband says that it works for him too, so we actually look forward to the occassional headache in some ways.
On a more serious note, it is only after seeking out relationships help and being able to talk to each other about things like this that we are truly comfortable with each other. I would encourage everyone else to follow the advice in the blog and find ways to share intimacy with your partner no matter how you are feeling. It will make you stronger in the long run
Hi Relationships Help! You are not alone, friend! Thanks so much for being willing to share on here, so that others can know! Blessings to you and your hubby! Kate
As a neurologist I suggest you read: Orgasm and Migraine Headache Vol 41, pp 512–514, May 2001
or: Now dear, I have a headache! Immediate improvement of cluster headaches after sexual activity. J Neurol Neurosurg Psychiatry. 2006; 77(11):1296.
Migraine headaches are believed to propagate through the serotonin neurotransmitter system. Interestingly, orgasm accesses similar neuropathways, suggesting an underlying pathophysiologic/neuro-anatomic substrate for headache relief with orgasm. I do suggest it to my patients (but only with my nurse present so the patient does not think I am a weirdo!)
Thanks for sharing this Todd! We are in no way, doctors! So it is nice to hear from someone who actually understands that side of everything! Good for you suggesting it to patience! I can only imagine the reactions you have gotten! Blessings to you! Kate
Hi Todd, I’d love to talk to you about this further from a doctor’s perspective. I get just the opposite … I get a headache AFTER … any thoughts on that? Thanks
Absolutely! I have found that I tend to avoid sex more when I’m stressed out and pre-occupied than when I have a headache. I didn’t believe my husband when he said it would help my headache, but it does!
Hi KS! I didn’t believe it would help either, but it sure does. If I can get past the headache pain and get into being together-it is a lovely fix! Thanks for sharing! Blessings to you and your hubby! Kate
[...] Not Tonight Honey, I Have A Headache – If you have used this line before and meant it or faked it, please read this post. You may be surprised at what Kate has to say. [...]
Any way to contact Todd directly — I have the “opposite” problem … and after the big “o” then I get a headache … and the doctors have been pushing me to get on an antidepressant of some variety since I tend to run as a hypervigilant person and they think I need calmed down … thus helping my insomnia in the process? But the problem with those antidepressants ALL of them cause libido issues and I am not willing to trade in my awesome sex life for being more “calm” … lol …
Hi Sandra! I totally get all that you are saying and have been reading lately of people who do get headaches afterwards. We do not have any of Todd’s information to give out, but you can comment on his comment and see if he responds back! Keep seeking God and other doctors if you need to! Blessings to you! Kate
[...] Not Tonight Honey I Have a Headache and 9. When She Has a [...]
I legitimately had a headache once and my husband joked ” come on, it’ll make you feel better.” I reluctantly submitted and lo and behold, headache gone! Now “I have a headache” is often just the beginning!
Hi Lisa! That is awesome-I love it! Sometimes our hubby’s are such smart people. They think sex is the answer to everything
and for headaches they just might be right! Lol! Thanks so much for sharing. 
Kate