To celebrate OFM’s 2nd birthday we are answering the top 6 reader’s questions:
Question #2 – What if my spouse doesn’t want to change or make things better?
“How do I get my husband to change?” This is one of my favorite questions that people ask. It is my favorite simply because I remember asking myself the same thing many times.
The first thing you need to remember is this: YOU CANNOT CHANGE YOUR HUBBY, only God can! And really, as hard as it is to accept, it is not our job to change them. I know I struggled with that for many years of our marriage. I wanted to change him, and I wanted him to change for me. It doesn’t work.
The next thing you need to remember is: You can be the change you want to see in your own marriage.
Let that sink in. You can be the change you want your hubby to be. You can step up and be the wife God is calling you to be in the scriptures. What does that look like exactly? I have many ideas on that and have shared them many times here on the blog, but really the best way to find out what that looks like is to dive into the scriptures yourself.
It doesn’t have to be fancy or theological. Get a concordance and look up the word wife. Read through all the Bible verses and the stories that share about wives. Pray the scriptures over your marriage and yourself. Ask God to reveal to you what he wants you to learn from the wives of the Bible. When you ask, he will answer!
Learning to leave your hubby in God’s hands and working on yourself only is very hard. Once you get started, it gets easier in many ways, though you will still struggle-we all do! The greatest part is that through our obedience, God blesses us. Seek to be obedient to his word for you as a wife. Pray and talk to him about what he desires for you. Not what he desires for the wives in your neighborhood, your church or your family – but you and you alone!
Be the change you want to see in your own marriage, you won’t be sorry you did!
Share how have you stepped up and become the wife God asks of you? How has God blessed your marriage through that obedience?