Sherry from Hookin’ Up Holy! says…
“Why sex toys?” That’s what my husband asked me when I first came to him with the idea to open an online sex toy shop. “Why can’t you sell shoes or something?” But he knew this would not just be a source of income, it would be a ministry.
The truth is, the sexual part of our marriage was always low on the list of priorities for me. I attended a private Christian high school and I vividly remember a talk our dorm mother did one day on sex and marriage. She told us that sex is only about 5% of a marriage. That stuck with me. I don’t know if she meant it like that, but I took it to mean that sex held about 5% importance in a marriage and I should give it about 5% of my time, thought and effort. Tragically, that is a lie I believed for the first 15 or so years of my marriage.
Our married sex life started out OK but it was never earth-shattering for me. Over the years, I didn’t refuse very often, but I did not enjoy sex and he knew it. I did it out of duty. Not surprisingly, our marriage was not a very good one, and we both seemed to settle for that. But eventually it got to a point where we decided things had to change. We tried a marriage seminar, a few different marriage courses at church, Christian counselling and several wonderful marriage books… all with great, godly principles, but none of which helped us for very long. Old habits soon returned.
One day, in my Google search for something Christian – can’t remember what – I came across the Christian Nymphos site. The name intrigued me and I clicked on it. I read a bit, actually quite surprised by some of the topics, and then moved on. But I kept coming back to it. Day after day, I would read a little more. Some days I spent a couple of hours or more. I couldn’t believe the freedom these women had!! I became envious of that and wanted it for myself. I began to feel as if I was missing out on something great that God wanted me to have. As I prayed on it, the Lord led me to scriptures, websites and books on sex. I became obsessed with reading about it, learning about it. I knew I wasn’t supposed to refuse my husband but it had never occurred to me that not enjoying it might be a sin! I began to see my attitude toward it as disrespectful to God and to my husband. I decided to make a change.
I went to my husband and told him I wanted to jump start our sex life and I was going to a sex toy store to find something that might help. I knew I needed a jump start – baby steps weren’t going to work! He was surprised, happy, hopeful and understandably apprehensive. I made my first purchase and that was the beginning of a new and exciting world for both of us!
The change that I did not expect was in the rest of our marriage. I could not believe it. It changed overnight. Our attitudes toward each other softened and our walls came down. It was a miracle. I credit that change to God, of course, and to sex.
Since my sexual awakening (or slap in the face, as I like to call it), it has been my goal to help other women find the sexual freedom that I have found. I think it is unfortunate and sinful when we settle for less than God has for us.
As to why I would consider a sex toy shop to be a ministry… well, when I first began buying toys, I went to a local sex toy shop with pornography and nudity galore. I did not like it and felt very uncomfortable and wasn’t sure if my being there was honoring to God. I began to think about opening an online store with no porn or nudity so people like us had somewhere safe to shop. In my research, I came across the Hookin’ Up Holy site and it was for sale. My husband came on board pretty quickly and the rest is history. It’s our prayer that all who use it will be blessed in their marriage bed.
Thanks to Brad and Katie for allowing us to share our testimony! God bless.