I think as humans we tend to grasp for guarantees! We like things that feel concrete and definite. Especially when we have invested or are considering investing in something or someone.
Marriage is no different. When we get married, we are vowing to love our spouse through all that happens in our lives. We are not able to imagine or understand the complete scope of what that might be, but it IS what we are promising. With the promise, at the time of our wedding we feel that it is a guarantee of sorts. Yet we have seen so many marriages that are stuck, completely broken or somewhere in between. They want things to change and when we encourage them to “be the change they want to see in their own marriage,” we hear questions and comments like this!
- If I work on me and do all that I need to do, how long do I put up with this?
- I have worked on me and done all that I need, my spouse has done nothing. God wouldn’t want me to stay in a marriage where I am treated like that, would he?
- I deserve better.
- This is not what I signed up for.
- I am tired of being a doormat and the only one to work in this marriage.
- You can’t tell me this is what God wants!
- I married the wrong person.
It is so hard to work hard in your marriage and not get the results you desire. To work and feel like it is not being reciprocated. To want a guarantee that your spouse will also work hard, but not getting it. Ted Cunningham, a marriage focused pastor from Woodland Hills Family Church in Branson, MI said this on his facebook page awhile back and it is spot on! Continue Reading