Kate says . . .
There are a handful of our posts, that even though we wrote them long ago, get comments daily. One of those posts is, I Don’t Find My Wife Attractive Anymore. It is no shocker that attraction and desire are huge in marriage, or is it?? This is the flip-flop post for all those wives out there who struggle with being attracted to their husbands. It is a two-part post. The first post, I Kissed Dating Hello, is for “soon to be wives” (those who are seriously dating or engaged). This second post is for those of you who are already married and struggle with attraction.
We all have struggles in marriage, there are ebbs and flows to any relationship. For many continued attraction to their husband can be an issue. As the years pass they don’t find themselves attracted to their husbands anymore. Some admit that they never felt attracted to them when they married them. So what do we do with this issue once married?
God is for your marriage
Too many times we are tempted to think that God might be using our feeling to tell us that this marriage is not going to work out. It is easy to think “how can I continue on in marriage if the attraction isn’t there?” Let me assure you that God wants your marriage to continue and that he desires for you to be attracted to each other. If your heart is open, he can restore anything. Remember that!
The enemy knows how important attraction is
It is everywhere we look. Images that speak of desire and attraction. Images that sell us a lie that everyone should be perfect looking, almost plastic like. Many of us buy into these images and the enemy knows it. He knows that we are an image oriented society. He uses that to his advantage. Brad and I have always said, that the enemy has the most to gain from breaking up marriages. Marriage effects so many other relationships in our lives and that makes them a prime target. Understanding that and praying against it is vital for our marriages.
He has changed physically
So you have been married for a while and your hubby has lost some of his hair, or what is there is turning grey, maybe he has gained a bit of weight. Maybe he doesn’t shower as often as when you were dating and is just plain “comfortable” in life. To be honest, wives this is the thing I hear the most. Here is the hard truth; you are called to respect and love your husband no matter what. In marriage as we both change, our attraction should continue to flourish. If you find yourself in this situation, I challenge you to see your husband for who he is, not for who he isn’t.
“But he should take care of himself, doesn’t God ask us to do that as well?” Continue Reading